lookit tells you a story
 

* old design dislaimer
 
   

     this is a story about Coyote, who has for many years been a great inspiration to our people. it is said that the ancestors of our tribe would spend much time singing and dancing and hunting animals, in the spirit of great Coyote. my father, who was chief of our people for many years, said that Coyote had always watched over our people and that he would always watch over our people. he said that great Coyote would be watching over our people even when the last of the Buffalo had fallen in battle and the last of the great trees had been cut down. my grandfather, who was chief of our people for many years before my father was chief of our people, said that this is why we call ourselves the Coyote people.

     it is said that Coyote was once a friend of Jackalope, and that they had once done much hunting together. Coyote would find the game and flush it out from its hiding place, and would chase it all around the great forest, and he then chase it behind a rock where Jackalope was hiding, and Jackalope would beat the living shit out of the game with his great horns. when this was done, Coyote and Jackalope would each take half of the game and return to his own tent and eat the game with his own wife. and this is the way things were.

     some day, many years ago, Coyote decided that he would like to take his half of the game back to Jackalope's tent and eat dinner with Jackalope's wife. but Coyote knew that Jackalope would not allow him to do this, because Jackalope was a very jealous husband. so, Coyote decided that he would have to trick Jackalope.

     when it came time for Coyote and Jackalope to hunt for game, Coyote told Jackalope that he would look around for game and flush it out and chase it around the great forest and then chase it behind the rock where Jackalope was waiting. Jackalope agreed and waited behind the rock. then, Coyote ran many miles away and visted his friend Snake. Coyote told Snake that Jackalope had tried to have dinner with his wife while he was out hunting in the forest and that he would like to teach Jackalope a lesson. Snake, who at that time was Coyote's friend, said that he would help to teach Jackalope a lesson. so, Coyote began to chase Snake, and Snake and Coyote ran many times around the great forest, and then they ran around the rock where Jackalope was hiding. when Jackalope tried to beat the living shit out of Snake with his great horns, Snake bit him in the nose. Jackalope's head swelled up like a fucking balloon, so he could not see or hear and could not move.

     then, Coyote picked up the rock and killed Snake, and he took half of Snake and went to Jackalope's tent. he told Jackalope's wife that he and Jackalope had made a deal to go to each other's tent with game and have dinner with each other's wife. Jackalope's wife was pleased, and she cooked the half of Snake that Coyote had brought and they ate it, and then they rutted like crazed Weasels.

     the next morning, Coyote returned to the rock to see what had become of Jackalope. there he found Jackalope, who had been dead for many hours. so, he took the other half of Snake and returned home to his own tent, where his wife cooked dinner and they ate, and then they rutted like crazed Weasels. and this is the way things were.

     my great-grandfather, who was chief of our people for many years before my grandfather was chief of our people, said that this is why though the Coyote people can satisy their wives, all of their friends end up dead or half eaten.

   


 

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Lookit The Root of All Stuff
...because he's got so goddamn many stories to tell that he could keep you up until all hours of the morning. well, actually, just knowing that such a place exists would keep any sane person from being able to sleep at night anyway.

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